WARNING !! Check your toilets before you sit down

Hi guys, this is Remanda and a warning to check your toilets before you sit down. I sat on the toilet at 2 AM this morning, I went to the toilet, sat my ass down on the toilet, got back up from the toilet, went to flush the toilet, looked in the toilet and I saw a spider in the toilet. Okay, and I'm not even being dramatic because I could be dramatic. The spider was the size of my palm. The body was the size of this cat and the legs were thick and hairy and long. Thick like my thighs. Because I had a heart attack. I had a fucking heart attack. That spider could have kissed my coochie. For all I know. That spider could have laid eggs in my cheeks for all I know. We shall see in nine months because there was a spider in the toilet. There was a spider in the toilet. I got up, ran into my mom's room, I said, Mom, don't panic, but there's a spider in the toilet. She got up, closed all the windows in the house. She went to investigate and she saw where the spider was hiding. When she flushed the spider, then went down the toilet. But she said the spider must have came from you then because where the spider was, it was underneath in the alcove bit where the flush comes out. So it wouldn't have survived your flush. I said, what do you mean? You're trying to tell me that it was in my cheeks and when I sat down, my cheeks opened up, but the spider came out from my cheeks. So you're trying to tell me that it was in my cheeks. And when I sat down, my cheeks opened up, but the spider came out from my cheeks. Anyway, I beat the shit out of myself because I took out my hair, my braids, like I beat the shit out of myself. I said, would you mean? Like, what that it was hiding in my cheeks? And when I sat down, my cheeks opened up, but the spider came out from my cheeks. Do you know how close that spider was to my coochie? Anyway, I'm going to go and hill. Uh, check your toilets before you go to toilet. Okay? I will never use a toilet again. I'm gonna have to do old school and go squat on the grass and do what I need to do because I'm terrified of toilets now. Do you know how close that spider was to my coochie? Anyway, I'm gonna go and hill. Uh, check your toilets before you go to toilet. Okay? I will never use a toilet again. I'm gonna have to do old school and go squat on the grass and do what I need to do because I'm terrified of toilets now.