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Dad, why is the American government the best government? Because of our endless appeals system. Joey, you're not writing down what I just said are you? Mm-hmm. Joey, stop for a second. What is the subject of your essay? Why is American government, the best government in the world? Your teacher crafted that question? Yeah. Why? Well... I'll look past the obvious problems in syntax for a moment, and I'll focus more on the core of the question. I mean, "A," does America have the best government in the world? And "B," what constitutes a "best government"? Is it crime, is it poverty, literacy? And America definitely not best. Perhaps not even better than most. We do have a very entertaining government... Dad. I'm sorry. Joey, are you familiar with the term "B.S." ? Bullshit. Yes, exactly. B.S., if I may, is what questions like the one your teacher posed are made for. Because even if America had the best government, there'd be no way to prove it. And how many pages are you writing? Two pages. Two pages... Definitely not in two pages. So what am I supposed to write? You can write whatever you want. Okay. Write about... write about America's amazing ability to make profit by breaking down trading tariffs and bringing American jobs to Third World countries. Or how good we are at executing felons. They're all correct answers. I can do that? See, Joey, that's the beauty of argument. 'Cause if you argue correctly, you're never wrong.