Post by @ayatalis

​Yesterday, a psychologist I know told me something that honestly stayed with me. ​“You know how I can tell in 30 seconds if someone grew up in a tough environment as a kid?” I thought — complicated tests, long talks. Turns out, it's way simpler. ​“Drop something next to them.” ​A pen, a cup, a phone — doesn’t matter. Just watch their reaction. If they instantly freeze, start apologizing for something that’s not even their fault — that tells you a lot. ​It means as a child, they were criticized for every little thing. ​“And there’s another method that never fails.” ​He leaned in closer. “Give them a sincere compliment. Tell them they did a great job.” ​A healthy person will smile and say thanks. ​But someone with deep impressions will push it away like it’s a hit. “No, no, it wasn’t me, I just got lucky.” They were only valued for achievements. ​Without conditions, they weren’t valued at all. ​“But the harshest test is sound.” He pointed at the door. “Slam it. Or raise your voice.” ​If the person shuts down, goes still like a statue — their home was full of loud arguments. ​The only way to get through it was to become invisible. Not breathe, not move, until the storm passed. ​“These people carry their childhood in their body for life.” ​I tried this with a few people I know. It worked with striking accuracy. #fyp #mother