Post by @megmorrison86

Happiness and grief can exist at the same time. I know that now more than ever. People sometimes ask me how I'm able to remain so strong after losing my husband. And the truth is, I didn't suddenly become strong when Derek died. That strength was built long before I lost him. The last 10 years of my life have required me to survive things I don't talk about publicly. Things that changed me. Things that forced me to become resilient when I never asked to be. So maybe that's why I know how to keep going even when my heart is completely broken. But keeping going doesn't mean I'm not grieving. I can laugh until my stomach hurts and still cry myself to sleep. I can feel genuinely happy and still wish more than anything that Derek were here. I can be excited about something in my future while simultaneously grieving the future I thought I was going to have. None of those things cancel each other out. And I think that's something people misunderstand about grief. You don't have to stay visibly broken to prove how deeply you loved someone. My happiness doesn't disrespect my grief. My strength doesn't mean this doesn't hurt. And moving forward doesn't mean I'm leaving him behind. I've learned that life after loss isn't choosing between grieving and living.