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Here are five things I always ask myself before spending time with my friends: Number one. Do they all secretly hate me? Number two. Will I say or do anything to make them all secretly hate me? Number three. When I say or do something to make them all secretly hate me, how do I disappear from the face of the earth? Number four. What kind of negative things will they say about me when I leave? Number five. Is this social situation really appropriate for packaging or should I wear something a bit more formal instead? Feel free to use these questions next time you spend time with your friends.