Who are you?

Who are you? You look exactly like Erling Haaland. But I know Haaland doesn't have a twin. Did Manchester City secretly buy Haaland's replacement? Boss, relax. It's me. New season, new look, new chapter 5. A haircut? That's why you look so different? Are you sure this is safe? What? Yes. Have you forgotten Samsung? What if the power of goals was in your hair? What if those 90 goals and greatest assists were trapped in those blonde hair? Boss, calm down. This is the new me. Chapter 5. I scored with long hair. I'll score with short hair. Maybe I'll score with no hair. Is that when I resign? This is when I resign. Everyone stay calm. Nobody panic. I think Haaland has been replaced with a younger Haaland. Someone check his passport. Bro went to the barber and came back as Haaland's younger brother. You can laugh about the haircut. But remember something. Defenders don't get three points for judging hairstyles. They get nightmares from goals. I apologize. The power was the giant wearing it. But please don't go bald. We're not ready. The power was the giant wearing it. But please don't go bald. We're not ready.