seriously

@potterybykyla

56.8K followers · usually 9.8K views a post

Views

479.7K

Likes

67.3K

Comments

156

Shares

383

SoundTikTok sound · original sound - potterybykyla

Why it worked

The video resonated by sharing a relatable parenting challenge and a successful, empathetic solution. The creator's vulnerability and focus on emotional intelligence for children, particularly those in foster care, likely drove engagement.

Summary

A foster mother shares a breakthrough in parenting her foster daughter by teaching her to identify and express her emotions, rather than resorting to punishment. This approach led to the child expressing sadness about missing her biological mother, shifting from anger to a more vulnerable state.

Structure

1Introduction to foster daughter's behavioral challenges
2Explanation of the parent's different approach (no punishment)
3Teaching the child to verbalize anger and identify the cause
4Child successfully expresses sadness about missing her biological mother
5Shift in child's attitude and successful communication
6Conclusion on teaching children to express emotions

On-screen text

seriously huge breakthrough with my foster daughter just with foster system half dozen behaviour didn't But different parents. definitely figuring do regulated behave anytime misbehaving. need they're of punishment. kids taken be something she tantrums meltdowns refuse fight, so her that say I'm really also it's this. the arguing only said, really it's mom. her shifted sadness identified was talk questions. about saying it kids way teach way.

Original caption

#pottery #fostercare #fostermom #parenting

More from @potterybykyla

More breakout videos from this creator.

Transcript

I could seriously cry. I just had the biggest breakthrough with my 5-year-old foster daughter who's been in the system for about a year and a half and has moved over a dozen times due to bad behavior. Which definitely didn't stop when she got to us, but we take a very different approach than most parents. We are definitely very much still figuring out what to do. But we do really believe that well-regulated kids behave well anytime a kid is misbehaving, it's because a need isn't being met or they're feeling something. And because of that, we don't use punishment because foster kids have had so much taken away, we don't need to be another person taking something good away from them. But she has been having daily tantrums/meltdowns where she will just refuse, fight, kick, hit, scream. So a few days ago I taught her that when she feels that way, she can say, 'I'm really mad at you, Mom. I'm really mad at you.' But then to also say, 'it's this.' And to the surprise, the next day when she started arguing about something, only about a minute in, she said, 'Mom, I feel really mad at you, but I think it's because I miss my mom.' And then and there, her whole attitude shifted from anger to sadness because she identified it. And I was able to comfort her and talk to her and ask questions and we chatted for about an hour. And she's been saying this consistently. It just proves that kids deal with emotions the way they know how, and we have to teach them a different way.