Watch me give my 3 YO a "time in" for hitting her big sis instead of a time out

Most parents today grew up being told to “go to their room to think about what they did wrong” and take a time out. But time outs are not an effective form of discipline because number 1, a young child is incapable of that type of self-reflection without an adult guiding them. Number 2, they are focused on the WRONG things during the time out. Instead of being able to reflect on their natural guilt for what they did wrong, their cognitive resources become hijacked by their distress that their parent no longer loves them (because affection & attention are synonymous with love to a child). This breeds resentment not only toward their parent, but also whoever they view as the cause for the time out, which in this case would be her big sister. And sibling resentment is the OPPOSITE of what I want. Staying with your child and offering support is NOT a reward for misbehavior. You can clearly see that my child was upset that she had to take time away from playing. And logically, wouldn’t kindness and compassion be the best example to show them if that’s what they’re struggling with? Why would cruelty and rejection help a child be MORE caring? My girls are thriving with “time ins” and my oldest is such a considerate & loving child, and my 3 YO is also wonderful, but still has her moments. I know she’s going to get there, especially now that the true empathy milestone is starting to kick in (this happens between 3 and 5) 💗 Make sure to follow me for all things REAL life evidence-based parenting & no-tears sleep training and head to the 🔗 in my bio or hhsleep.com for more resources #momtok #timeout #timein #momshelpingmoms #creatorsearchinsights Why I do a time in instead of a time out What’s a time in Time out putting kids in time out