my take on "when you're not looking for it, you'll finally meet the right person"

If you've been single for a long time like I have, I want to tell you something. You know the quote that goes when you're not looking for it, that's when you're going to find it. Whenever I hear that, that makes me want to bash my head into a wall. And if you relate, you can relate. But I want to encourage you with something that has really changed the way I look at it. I'm so rude in your own life, in your own plans, in your own things that you're doing that you're not searching for it desperately. Not because you don't want it, but you can still desire something while being completely okay without that thing. And if you're not in that place yet, then the number one thing you need to understand is it's okay to desire something and want something, but it's not okay to place that desire above God or above everything else in your life. Like you have a wonderful life without that thing or without that thing that you want, right? And it's super important to fill your life so much with your own things going on, that you don't have room to complain to someone or to someone. And I'm here to tell you right now, the advice I wish somebody gave to me. You can still desire something and still want it, while also trusting that at the right time, it's all going to come into fruition. But it really stems from you being okay in your own life because even when that person does enter your life, they are not going to complete you. Like you are complete as a whole, on your own. You're single, not lonely. There's a difference, okay? Again, you can desire something, but don't let your desire become so big that it's the only thing you look for these days. Because naturally, that makes you feel like you don't have something and you're clinging onto it even more. So just be really rooted in your own life, do your own thing, do your hobbies, hang out with your friends, enjoy this time. I'm not going to sit here and tell you, oh, like just loving being single and like live your best life. Yes, I'm all for that, but you get to a point where when you've been single long enough, I know the feeling of being like, okay, this has got to end. I get it. I know that feeling. And I'm just here to remind you that you can still desire something while not placing that thing as an idol or above everything else. You can still want it, but it's not your whole world. Okay? Hopefully that helps you to change your mindset and change the way you think about singleness.