some people can only show care to the extent of their emotional capacity

some people can only show care to the extent of their emotional capacity Someone can love you and not be able to show you in a way that feels like love to you. And it's likely because they can only show they care to the extent of their emotional capacity. On my last post, I was talking about how some people can't take accountability because all they feel is shame and they don't want to sit with that. So they may avoid you or deflect. Someone commented and said, or maybe they just don't care about you. I don't think it's that simple. People come online all the time and then talk about how when they were younger, their immigrant parents would do something crazy, something outlandish to them. I saw a girl talk about how her parents locked her outside because she went to go hang out with her friends. Her parents didn't take accountability for what they did. Instead, they just asked her if she was hungry. In that situation, or many other situations that people have talked about online, a parent doing that to their child doesn't mean they don't love their child. It literally means they just cannot sit and take accountability for what they did because what they experienced was shame. And that is not a lack of love, it's a lack of tools. They hurt you, didn't take accountability, they don't care. That doesn't necessarily mean they never cared about you or they don't care about you. Accountability requires self-awareness. And somebody who hurt you and is unable to hold themselves accountable, is lacking self-awareness. The ability to love you to full capacity requires self-awareness. It's easier to say that person doesn't care about me because they hurt me, they couldn't apologize, they couldn't take accountability for it. It means they don't care about me. Black and white. But most things are not black and white. Oh, and I forgot to add that just because you understand why someone may do something, why they're unable to take accountability, doesn't mean you have to give them access. You have to give them access.