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Revenge Ideas From A Lawyer That Won't Get You Arrested... Probably Welcome to another edition of revenge ideas from a lawyer that won't get you arrested... probably. Before we get started, I have to say that this is not legal advice and I strongly recommend against you doing any of the things I'm about to tell you. And as always, today's episode is brought to you by Bellesa, our favorite female owned, female pleasure company that makes toys that will honestly goddamn change your life. Like, because I know the guy you're dating is a fucking loser who's probably never made you fill in the blank, I promise you, Bellesa absolutely can. So if you want to check them out, head over to the link in my bio and get a free gift card or toy just for signing up. And with that, let's get into today's idea. So today we're going to do things a little differently and we are going to address the most popular and absolutely beautifully unhinged revenge idea that has ever been suggested in my comments. That's right, we are talking shrimp in the curtain rods, baby. And while that seems like a very fun idea, I'm far too lazy to like get a stool and take down curtain rods and fumble around with that. I would get caught. I would 100% get caught. But no problem, because these little baby shrimp, they're small and they'll rot anywhere. You're not gonna do instead is head down to the grocery store and grab a bag of frozen shrimp, pop those in your purse and head over to this man's house. And when he'll be in the shower or locked away in the other room playing video games with his guy friends who probably wants to fuck more than you, you can get as creative as you want finding little inconspicuous places to hide these little baby shrimp. In the fridge, behind the stove, if you want to get really crazy, you could open up his couch cushions and bury a bunch in there. And if you're gonna do that, put them on the bottom of the couch cushions so when they do start to thaw and like emanate some sort of smell, it's not gonna be readily apparent. Or if you want to really confuse him, you could put them on the top of the couch cushions so then he's like, why the fuck is there shrimp here? And then he thinks he's found the cause of the problem and he'll get rid of them and say, that's the idea. Do that. I like that one better. And what could theoretically happen is that in the coming days, weeks, and months, those shrimp will begin to thaw. And then they will begin to rot. And then they will begin to emanate the most putrid scent you could ever possibly imagine. It'll get bad enough that Satan himself in hell will be able to smell these shrimp. To the point where you will honestly have to break up with him and break your own toxic pattern because you will not be able to step foot into that apartment. And he will then be alone, heartbroken, unable to get any bitches because no self-respecting woman, let alone a girl with no self-respect, would ever step into that apartment with the funk ass stink that is going on in there. And it will get to the point where he will have to move out to get any relief. And you bet his ass he's losing his security deposit because what the fuck? The building may be condemned and hopefully he's liable for all of those costs. Who's to say?