Are y'all doing ANY research on child development before having kids???

@cassiemomcoach

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SoundTikTok sound · original sound - cassiemomcoach

Why it worked

The video likely resonated because it addresses a common parental struggle and offers a perspective that validates the creator's expertise while also calling out perceived shortcomings in general parenting knowledge. The creator's passionate delivery and direct address to the audience likely contributed to engagement.

Summary

The creator questions whether parents research child development before having kids, arguing that many do not, which shows in their parenting. She emphasizes that parenting is based on research, not just opinion, and criticizes common parenting approaches that she deems ineffective or harmful, advocating for a more informed and empathetic approach.

Structure

1Questioning parents' research on child development
2Critiquing common parenting practices as opinion-based and ineffective
3Highlighting the importance of research, neuroscience, and child psychology
4Explaining the impact of parenting on a child's nervous system and long-term development
5Advocating for respectful, empathetic parenting and offering to share knowledge

Product placement

Kendra | baby & toddler expert: ACTS - provides advice on child development and parenting. Removing this would change the topic of the video. The creator is referencing Kendra's expertise and content. This is not a direct promotion of a product or service, but rather a reference to an expert in the field. The creator is using Kendra's content as a point of discussion and comparison, not to sell anything directly related to Kendra.

Call to action

Original caption

❤️ @Kendra | baby & toddler expert #parentinglittles #emotionalregulation #raisinglittles #motherhoodunfiltered #consciousparenting

More from @cassiemomcoach

On-screen text

Are y'all doing ANY research on child development before having kids??? MOST OF YOU ANY RESEARCH PARENTING BEFORE YOU HAVE AND IT SHOWS. THIS IS LITERALLY THE MOST IMPORT ANY OF US WILL EVER MAYBE, LIKE, Parenting isn't just opinion, there is research about what works THAT OTHER PARENTS AND TEACHERS I KNOW THAT TEACH VERY SIMILAR DO IN THIS SPACE ONLINE, FEEL THE SAME WAY SOMETIMES. BECAUSE THE AMOUNT I'VE GOTTEN ON MY MOST RECENT VIRAL VIDEO ABOUT HANDLING HITTING ARE JUST, LIKE, SO ABSURD, SOME OF THEM. AND IT IS ASTOUNDING TO ME SOMETIMES THE LACK OF EDUCATION ABOUT CHILD DEVELOPMENT AND HOW LITTLE KIDS BRAINS ACTUALLY WORK, SYSTEMS ACTUALLY WORK, AND WHAT'S ACTUALLY GOING TO BE EFFECTIVE, GOING TO BE EFFECTIVE, THE MOMENT, BUT LONG TERM WHEN IT COMES TO TEACHING. IS, LIKE, KENDRA AND THE OTHER PEOPLE THAT THE OTHER THERAPIST WHO I HEAR TALK ABOUT THIS LIKE, WE'RE NOT. MAKING THIS STUFF UP OUT OF LIKE, IT'S NOT JUST AN OPINION WE CAME UP WITH. IT IS LIVED EXPERIENCE, PLUS 30+ EXPERIENCE, PLUS 30+ YEARS OF RESEARCH AROUND CHILD DEVELOPMENT, NERVOUS SYSTEM WORK, NEUROSCIENCE, BRAIN DEVELOPMENT. LIKE, ALL OF THESE CHILD PSYCHOLOGY. THINGS THAT SHOW US THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY TO HELP OUR LITTLE KIDS AND SCREAMING AT YOUR KID IS NOT THE WAY LIKE, I'M SORRY THAT MIGHT FEEL EFFECTIVE IN THE MOMENT, BUT SCARRING YOUR CHILD INTO COMPLIANCE, MAKING THEM SO FEARFUL OF CERTAIN BEHAVIORS OR REACTIONS, THAT YOU EFFECTIVELY TEACH THEM. AND IT'S NOT YOU EFFECTIVELY HELP NERVOUS SYSTEM AND EMPATHY AND ALL OF THESE SKILLS THAT THEY NEED TO BE SUCCESSFUL HUMANS. YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THE FUNCTIONS OF BEHAVIOR AND HOW BEHAVIOR IS REINFORCED OR NOT REINFORCED. YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND YOUR TINY CHILD'S NERVOUS SYSTEM THEY'RE DOING WHEN A HALF THREE OR FIVE EVEN, ISN'T JUST LIKE THEM BEING DEFIANT OR MANIPULATIVE OR MAKING LOGICAL DECISIONS ABOUT BAD BEHAVIOR. IT'S LITERALLY THEIR NERVOUS SYSTEM IN FIGHT OR FLIGHT. AND MOST HERE'S THE THING, WHO ARE ACTUALLY IN MY WORLD, THE ONES WHO ARE IN MY COMMENTS, WHO ARE DMING MY COURSES, WHO ARE GENUINELY LIKE, YOU GUYS GET IT AND YOU UNDERSTAND AND YOU'RE DOING THE WORK. VIDEOS SOMETIMES MAKE IT SO APPARENT TO ME HOW NORMALIZED IT HOW NORMALIZED IT IS TO ONLY PARENT FROM A PLACE OF EGO AND POWER AND CONTROL AND THEN CALL IT DISCIPLINE TO MAKE YOURSELF FEEL BETTER. THAT IS JUST INSANELY FRUSTRATING. BUT IF YOU WANT TO KNOW BE A RESPECTFUL PARENT AND STILL HOLD BOUNDARIES, A KIND PARENT, WHO STILL IS THE LEADER OF THEN YOU CAN FOLLOW ME. YOU CAN WATCH MY VIDEOS. WHAT I SHARE AND TEACH. AND OTHERWISE, YOU BE HERE.

Transcript

Most of you any research on parenting before you have and it shows. This is literally the most important any of us will ever maybe, like, Parenting isn't just opinion, there is research about what works that other parents and teachers I know that teach very similar do in this space online, feel the same way sometimes. Because the amount I've gotten on my most recent viral video about handling hitting are just, like, so absurd, some of them. And it is astounding to me sometimes the lack of education about child development and how little kids brains actually work, systems actually work, and what's actually going to be effective, going to be effective, the moment, but long term when it comes to teaching. Is, like, Kendra and the other people that the other therapist who I hear talk about this, like, we're not. Making this stuff up out of like, it's not just an opinion we came up with. It is lived experience, plus 30+ experience, plus 30+ years of research around child development, nervous system work, neuroscience, brain development. Like, all of these child psychology. Things that show us the most effective way to help our little kids and screaming at your kid is not the way. Like, I'm sorry that might feel effective in the moment, but scarring your child into compliance, making them so fearful of certain behaviors or reactions, that you effectively teach them. And it's not you effectively help nervous system and empathy and all of these skills that they need to be successful humans. You have to understand the functions of behavior and how behavior is reinforced or not reinforced. You have to understand your tiny child's nervous system they're doing when a half three or five even, isn't just like them being defiant or manipulative or making logical decisions about bad behavior. It's literally their nervous system in fight or flight. And most here's the thing, who are actually in my world, the ones who are in my comments, who are DMing my courses, who are genuinely like, you guys get it and you understand and you're doing the work. Videos sometimes make it so apparent to me how normalized it how normalized it is to only parent from a place of ego and power and control and then call it discipline to make yourself feel better. That is just insanely frustrating. But if you want to know be a respectful parent and still hold boundaries, a kind parent, who still is the leader of then you can follow me. You can watch my videos. What I share and teach. And otherwise, you be here.