Double standards as a child free by choice millennial

@40withkatie

4.9K followers · usually 4.5K views a post

Views

27.1K

Likes

2.7K

Comments

564

SoundTikTok sound · original sound - 40withkatie

Why it worked

The video likely resonated due to its relatable discussion of social dynamics and perceived double standards between child-free individuals and parents, tapping into a common point of contention and shared experience within certain social circles.

Summary

A woman discusses the double standards she perceives as a child-free millennial. She recounts a situation where her boyfriend's friend, who has a child, assumed their child could join a planned wine-tasting trip, despite the child-free couple's expectation of an adults-only getaway. This leads her to question whether she is being unreasonable or if the assumption itself is unfair.

Structure

1Introduction of child-free status and planned getaway
2Friend's request to join with their child
3Couple's initial agreement and planning
4Friend's revelation about childcare issues and insistence on bringing the child
5Discussion of perceived double standards and exhaustion
6Questioning reasonableness of the situation

On-screen text

Double standards as a child free by choice millennial Childfree people. I need to know if I'm being unreasonable here because the absolute audacity of what happened this morning is still just blowing my mind. So my boyfriend and I are child free by choice and every year we plan a couple of long weekend getaways to different wine regions in the country, specifically to taste wine. My boyfriend's good friend reached out to him and expressed interest in joining us on one of these trips. He said that he and his wife have not had an adult vacation since their first child was born and said that it looks like we have a lot of fun when we go and they would love to join us. And we said, absolutely, we would love to have you join us. In fact, we're going to upstate New York to the Finger Lakes in October. Please come. This is a few months ago when this conversation started. And since then we've been planning the trip, booking hotels, the flights, rental cars, all of it. This morning my boyfriend gets a phone call asking if the itinerary is ready. And it isn't. That's no big deal. But then the bomb is dropped. My boyfriend's friend lets him know that unfortunately, there is no family available to watch their one year old daughter after all. He went on to say how bummed they were because they haven't had a vacation that wasn't something other than a family related deal, whether it's a wedding or funeral in years. After talking about it more, they decided, fuck it, she's gonna come with. Because in her one year of life, she has been a great traveler for all of the family functions they've attended. So coming on this trip should be no problem. Okkk, no problem. No problem for who? I'm sure she's a great traveler. I just don't think this is the And the trip aside, for me, this brings up a bigger issue. When you're the child free friend, you are always expected to accommodate your friends who have children, yet it's never reciprocated. And honestly, it's exhausting. But anyway, am I being unreasonable or would you have also assumed that a wine tasting trip planned by a child free couple would be an adults only.

Original caption

Child free means accommodating your friends with kids in ways they would never be expected to accommodate you. Anyone else feel this too? ##childfreebychoice##childfreemillennial##childfreetiktok##childfreelife##childfreelifestyle

More from @40withkatie

More breakout videos from this creator.

Transcript

Childfree people. I need to know if I'm being unreasonable here because the absolute audacity of what happened this morning is still just blowing my mind. So my boyfriend and I are child free by choice and every year we plan a couple of long weekend getaways to different wine regions in the country, specifically to taste wine. My boyfriend's good friend reached out to him and expressed interest in joining us on one of these trips. He said that he and his wife have not had an adult vacation since their first child was born and said that it looks like we have a lot of fun when we go and they would love to join us. And we said, absolutely, we would love to have you join us. In fact, we're going to upstate New York to the Finger Lakes in October. Please come. This is a few months ago when this conversation started. And since then we've been planning the trip, booking hotels, the flights, rental cars, all of it. This morning my boyfriend gets a phone call asking if the itinerary is ready. And it isn't. That's no big deal. But then the bomb is dropped. My boyfriend's friend lets him know that unfortunately, there is no family available to watch their one year old daughter after all. He went on to say how bummed they were because they haven't had a vacation that wasn't something other than a family related deal, whether it's a wedding or funeral in years. After talking about it more, they decided, fuck it, she's gonna come with. Because in her one year of life, she has been a great traveler for all of the family functions they've attended. So coming on this trip should be no problem. Okkk, no problem. No problem for who? I'm sure she's a great traveler. I just don't think this is the And the trip aside, for me, this brings up a bigger issue. When you're the child free friend, you are always expected to accommodate your friends who have children, yet it's never reciprocated. And honestly, it's exhausting. But anyway, am I being unreasonable or would you have also assumed that a wine tasting trip planned by a child free couple would be an adults only.