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My favourite kind of person is the credentialed degenerate. Someone with a very serious job who becomes deeply unserious the second they clock out. By day they're performing surgery, negotiating contracts or managing millions of dollars. Then 6:00 arrives and that same person opens the group chat with, "Listen up you diseased pigeons." They'll write "kind regards" to the CEO, then send the group chat a video of a horse kicking another horse in the face and say, "Me giving constructive feedback." Their LinkedIn photo says trusted industry professional. Their camera roll says evidence for the prosecution. And their group chats are horrifying. Five people, 12 degrees, three professional licenses, not one admissible message. One is a doctor, one is a lawyer, one manages 200 people. And right now, all three are zooming in on a blurry photo, trying to determine whether that's an elbow or a nipple. These people aren't immature. They've simply exceeded their daily allowance of responsibility. Their brains have been calm, articulate, and technically correct for 10 straight hours. The last remaining brain cell would now like to do hood rat shit with its college educated friends. The patients survived. The spreadsheets reconciled. Now let the silly goose loose. Send this to the most qualified idiot you know. The Omnivore Club is a protected habitat for intelligent, curious, deeply unserious people. Join us through the link in bio.