I'm not gonna hold your hand when I

I'm not gonna hold your hand when I cause I quite literally cause I quite literally hope that it hits some of you across the face cause you're a grown ass but intimacy but intimacy creates attachment attachment creates relationships I know what a crazy especially especially for some of you men stop stop asking people stop asking people to experience experience relationship and expect them to have casual level feelings I think that we have started treating attachment like it's some like it's some kind of character like it's some kind of character flaw like if someone like if someone catches feelings after speaking to someone being intimate with them sleeping with them sharing their deepest darkest fears being emotionally vulnerable that there is something wrong with them but at this ripe but at this ripe age what did what did you expect to happen human beings human beings are wired for connection it is not a bug it is not a bug in the system it is the whole fucking system so many people do not want a relationship with you they do however want the parts want the parts of a relationship that they benefit from they want the good morning the emotional support the phone calls when they've had a bad day the consistency the consistency the loyalty the access to you the access to you they want someone to someone to listen to them like a partner to comfort to comfort them like a partner to prioritize to prioritize them like a partner but the second but the second you bring up a title the commitment. the commitment or the accountability responsibility that comes along with it's all it's all of a sudden I'm not ready for a relationship and this is where a lot of you become confused because they're because they're not rejecting intimacy they're rejecting accountability you want relationship you want relationship level love without without being able to provide relationship level security eventually you eventually you will realize that you're carrying the emotional of a relationship of a relationship without one that actually exists at least not at least not officially the lesson the lesson here is not that you need to be less attached the lesson is that you need to pay when someone's actions when someone's actions are creating a relationship that their words refuse to acknowledge some people don't some people don't actually wanna be your partner they just they just don't wanna lose access to the benefits of having one most of us aren't most of us aren't struggling because we caught we're struggling because someone invited someone invited us into a level that is that is usually reserved for relationships someone is benefiting someone is benefiting from your emotional investment all while refusing to all while refusing to define where it is it is most certainly okay to decide that that is not enough for you relationships require accountability they also require responsibility for someone else's feelings emotions so stop asking so stop asking yourself why am why do I feel things so deeply why am I too emotional and start asking you continually you continually engage with someone who refuses to give you clarity