How to get out of poverty if you don't trust people

Let me just lift up the hood for you, all you neurodivergent folks out there who have trust issues. Let me explain what's happening in your nervous system, let me explain what's happening in your bank account, let me explain how people are actually breaking out of the cycle to get ahead. So, if you're somebody who has ADHD, who's, you know, has CPTSD, is experienced an uncertain or like chaotic childhood or extended period of time in their life, what happens is your nervous system gets stuck in the fight or flight state. And so if you break down the nervous system, what the nervous system is, it's comprised of the brain and the spinal cord, okay? You have your central nervous system, which is everything that's encased in bone, which is the brain and the spinal cord, like I just said. But then you have the peripheral nervous system, which is your nerves. Nervous system, get it? Nervous system. Nerves. The peripheral nervous system are the nerves. The two parts of your peripheral nervous system are your somatic, which is any voluntary movement that you can make with your body, and your autonomic nervous system. Your autonomic nervous system runs in the background, it is what? Automatic, okay? Your autonomic nervous system is made of three parts: your parasympathetic nervous system, your sympathetic nervous system, and your enteric nervous system. Parasympathetic is rest and digest, sympathetic is the fight or flight, enteric is brain-gut relationship. What happens when you live in a constant state of survival mode and your environment is unpredictable, which I think, and I say this based on what I currently know about ADHD, creates, um, unpredictable environments are what result in the ADHD and the adaptations that you might have that we call now neurodivergent. What happens when you're in this constant state of fight or flight is that it grows a part of your brain called the amygdala, which is the fear center of the brain. It asks the question, is this going to kill me? Okay? And so what happens is when you consistently have this running in the background, one, it's metabolically expensive, it's jacking up the amount of glucose, adrenaline, and cortisol running through your body, and two, it becomes very hard to trust that there's a way out. Why? Because the job of the sympathetic nervous system, the fight or flight, the amygdala, is to keep us the safe, aka the same, okay? It doesn't want change. Change is metabolically expensive, and we're already running a metabolically expensive process, which is fear and worry and hypervigilance and constant surrounding checking of our surroundings of threats. So we don't we don't have the metabolic energy to change, okay, which makes it hard to trust people. The other thing is the other part about like being able to trust people, why it's so hard to trust people if you're in this constant state of fight or flight, you have ADHD, of CPTSD, whatever your thing is, is that like trusting somebody who's going to get you to the next level, that like not only is change metabolically expensive, but the people who are where you're trying to go have calm nervous systems. And let me tell you, calm people are not really attracted to chaotic people, and chaotic people are not really attracted to calm people. It's a nervous system mismatch. We literally do not feel safe in a calm environment, with calm people, with steady people, because our body, our physiology is literally used to an elevated state of adrenaline, cortisol, glucose, like I mentioned, and it becomes addicted to that. And it sees the safe people and it's like, bro, what? I can't even. So like, here's how here's how people are getting out of this, here are how they're getting ahead, here's how it impacts your finances. How it impacts your finances is it tends to make you somebody who's a spender rather than a saver. You'll run your money down to zero, you'll make impulsive choices with your money, and you'll live on a whim, you're intuitive, you're like, spontaneous, you're like, I just want to go on the trip, YOLO. Like you're not thinking about the future because your nervous system and your brain is like literally wired to like stop you from thinking about the future. So, financially it becomes very hard to get ahead. How do you trust people? How do you start to create a change? The thing that you have to know and just you got to look out for examples in your environment, because once your brain changes and like understands this information and believes it, this is where like a lot of things unlocks for me. Anybody who is successful, anybody who is accomplishing and doing something that you want to be doing, they have somebody behind them helping them get to where they want to go, whether it's a coach, whether it's a friend, whether it's a wife or a husband, whether it's God, whether it's like a mentor, there is somebody behind them. Nobody, nobody's doing this alone. And so if you want to break out of the cycle, like you have to learn how to build trusting relationships with other people. You literally have to find your people. End of story. There's no way out of it, like you don't do it alone. It does not happen that way. And the and the people who have gotten me to where I am today, mentors, coaches, like even books, podcasts, friends, like I would not be here today where I am currently if it wasn't for other people. And it took me a while to trust, but it's like do it in small doses and watch the change become exponential over time.