Who the heck was I dating in another country Pt 1

Who the heck was I dating in another country? Part one. I came with notes. Okay, so in late May or early April, I posted this bikini photo that I took at the Global Ambassador in Scottsdale. It's just like a nice hotspot, whatever. My Instagram doesn't have that many followers, not even close to as many as I have on TikTok, and so it's kind of more of just like a close friends type of space. And so this photo randomly blew up. I got like 50,000 viewers. I got like 1,000 followers from it, and what came with that was a lot of DM requests. I'm not typically somebody who's really looking through my DM requests. It's usually a bunch of weirdos, but in this case, I knew there could be a hot guy in there. So I was keeping an eye out. I was keeping an eye on my DM requests, and I came across this guy. He had messaged me, and he said, "We would look really good together." Now, I was really intrigued by this because he had a private profile, so I couldn't see any of his photos, and his profile photo was not like a photo of his face, so I couldn't see what he looked like. And I was a little intrigued because I wanted to know if this guy was cute, and second, I was like, "This guy better be cute, and now I have to find out because he said we'd look good together." And if he was really not cute and said that we'd look cute together, then I'd be pissed. And so now I was curious, and I had to know. So I DM him back, and I was just like, "Well, that, like, what do you look like? Better be cute with that bold kind of statement." And he sends a selfie, and he was cute. So I was like, "Oh, okay, he is he is cute, whatever." Now, typically, if I'm talking to somebody online, it probably won't last more than like a day. Like, I if I don't know you in person, I like meeting people out in the wild. I don't really do the internet thing. So this is very all really out of character for me. But he ditches the texting almost immediately and goes straight for voice memos, and so that makes me a little more, you know, into the conversation, and I'm listening to his voice memos, and he sounds really smart, and he's kind of funny, kind of charming, and I was like, "Oh, this guy is something else." Now, I really liked that he jumped to voice memos, and then the voice memos later that day turned into a phone call, and pretty much beyond that, we communicated mainly phone call. We called each other all day long, every single day. He would stay up till 3:00 a.m. talking to me on the phone, and yeah, it was just really cutsey. It was like honeymoon phase beginning of starting to really like somebody, and everything was really cute. Now, what I really, really liked and what got me kind of attached to him really fast was the fact that we were doing this no BS, like, let's just lay it all out on the line kind of approach. So he told me, he's like, "You know, I have a new job and I'm building a client tell, so like money's not where it used to be," and like he was telling me good, bad, ugly, where he's from, like all about his ex-girlfriends and recent experiences and whatnot, and then I told him good, bad, and ugly and like I laid it all out on the line, right? But and this was really refreshing. It was just really refreshing. It it was just like everything that we everything you would like typically reserve from a partner immediately, we we told each other at the start, okay? So I was very comfortable with this guy. He was very receptive to the things that I was telling him, very non-judgmental, and I'm telling him about exes and experiences and just anything you could think of we discussed. Okay, so like the first month of talking, we are obviously getting to know each other really well, and with that comes like little tiffs here and there. Like we had little like disagreements or um just like dumb, you know, like dumb things that really just don't matter that much, but he would always do the thing where he like takes accountability and apologizes immediately, like for any little thing. And I could be just like being sassy one day and I'm like, "You're like being annoying." Then he would be like, "You're right. I shouldn't I shouldn't have approached it this way. I should have done this," and then he'd apologize sincerely. And I was like, "Oh my gosh, like even like if I was being a little like much and like just kind of like, mmm, exaggerating, let's say exaggerating about certain things, like he would still take accountability, apologize. Like it didn't matter what the thing was, he would always apologize immediately. And this is something that he loved to point out. And it was something I didn't it didn't like flagged to me as strange at first, but like looking back, obviously hindsight, everything is 2020, but he would like do something really great, but then let me know, like, "Isn't it refreshing how like a a real man will take accountability and apologize when he's wrong and can see when he's doing this and that?" Like he would always kind of like point out when he did something great. But at first, I was a little blind. I kind of notice he did it, but I was like, "Oh, he just like he wants his flowers. I'll give it to him because he's being so sweet." So, he would do great things, he would fish for compliments, but then like I didn't feel icky about giving it to them giving him the compliments because I don't know, like he was being cute and sweet. So, that was one thing I really liked. I also really liked how complimentary he was, and he wouldn't just compliment me on looks, which is something I typically get, which love it still. Like, let's not I'm not trying to tell the universe I don't like those kind of compliments, but he gave me those um kind of compliments that were more thoughtful and more about who I am as a person and my character and just genuine compliments that made me feel very seen and not in a way of like I'm hot, but just like about my brain and the way I think and he would point certain things out that no one's ever pointed out before. And it's things I know people know about me, but there's just never been highlighted and it feels good to be highlighted, right? Like your great qualities. So, he was really great at complimenting me. So, loved that. Um and now, this is all kind of the first month. We're honeymoon phasing it, like I'm deciding I really like this guy. He's very thoughtful, caring, receptive, and no BS, right? Well, there were some red flags. So one thing I really could not stand at this time was actually no, I lied. This is something that I thought was cute at first, but eventually pissed me off was the facts that he wanted to add all my friends on social media. I was a little hesitant about this, but he was telling me I, you know, things were getting more serious and he was asking if I told my friends about him, and I was like, "Yeah, I'm telling some of my friends about him," and he's like, "Since like we're dating long distance, I've done this before, like I just want to um make sure that like I'm a part of your life and like people you love know me." So he asked if he could add my friends on Instagram, and I was like, "I mean, I guess. Like there's only like a couple that like you would care to follow, but like I don't know, I found it weird because I know that I wouldn't. If my friends were talking to a stranger in another country, I probably wouldn't care to like chit-chat with them, like no offense, but I don't know, I just found it kind of odd. But he was really adamant about his being intentional and like wanting to be a part of my life, and so I allowed him to add my friends. And what came with this was some kind of light flirtation, and this is, uh, like it gets embarrassing because I let him get away with a lot of this and the way he would talk to my friends and it's it's really bizarre. So he's somebody who would send me like I would get anywhere from 8 to 10 selfies a day, sometimes more. Like sometimes I'd get 8 in a row just in mid-conversation, and it was very bizarre. I've never had someone like, especially a man, like send me so many selfies all the time. I found it bizarre. But he would like get to the point where like I stopped giving him like so many compliments, and he started kind of trying to fish for them through my friends. And he would like send a mirror selfie and be like, "You do you like my snuggy?" Like he'd have this like snuggy thing, he's like, "You like my snuggy?" And I'm like, "Why are you so why are you asking my friends if they like your snuggy though?" Like I don't know, like things start, you know, things started starting to take a little turn with the friends, and the boundaries with the friends were becoming a little strange. Go to part two.