How to manipulate your human 101 🍌

Welcome How to manipulate your human 101 🍌 Lesson 1: Never beg for attention. Don't give them that satisfaction. Sit across the room from them like they don't even exist and let them flock to you. Period. Lesson 2: Sleep all day so they think you're innocent. Fly under radar until 10 PM and then cause absolute chaos when they try to sleep. Lesson 3: When you see them put their shoes on to leave the house, look at them like they are abandoning you forever. They'll either take you with them or bring you treats back. Lesson 4: Pretend your ears are for decoration when they call you to come. But all of the sudden, they work flawlessly when you hear that cheese wrapper from across the house. Lesson 5: Demand to sleep in bed with them. You may have to give some charity cuddles for the first 10 minutes. Then BAM, take up 80% of the bed so they wake up folded like a lawn chair. That's it for today. Make sure you follow so you don't miss the next session because I'm just getting started.